A straight and narrow, critical look at my fangirl obsession with Tegan and Sara.
- You have 2 playlists on Spotify: “T&S” and “Other.” Anything by another artist that you actually listen to gets thrown on “T&S” or you probably won’t ever hear it.
- You find yourself pronouncing words the Canadian way after watching one too many interviews on YouTube. People look at you funny when you do this. You giggle when it happens, because nothing is cuter than a Canadian accent.
- You read about Sara’s coffee addiction and start building your own tolerance, downing 2-3 cups before even making it into work, even though caffeine gives you panic attacks, because you feel the need to keep up with her, and because competition is hot (OK, and so that you’re used to it by the time you become her girlfriend). Decaf is for pussies.
- You don’t need to look up who’s singing lead on which songs. You can tell who’s who just by their voices. (You could tell them apart in photos a long time ago. Anyone who can’t is fucking blind!)
- Would it be weird if you hosted a birthday party in their honor in September? You could invite all your lesbian friends…
- You wouldn’t know what the fuck to wear without their style to inspire you. (Is this a baby dyke thing? We’re not sure.) You’re proud of the keen eye you’ve developed and find yourself categorizing clothes in stores, thinking, “Sara would totally wear this!” or “That’s totally a Tegan outfit…” Most of your work outfits could easily transition to stage attire, just in case an opportunity ever arises. Someday maybe you’ll find your own style…
- You remember in horror about an hour after the Supreme Court passed its ruling that now that it’s legal in the US, T&S might actually marry their girlfriends! Even though no proposals or threats of proposals have been made, you find yourself wondering how realistic it would be to quickly form a lesbian band and gain enough popularity to open for one of their concerts, then seduce Sara with your wit and charm. Or, if all else fails, crash a wedding Bollywood-style.
- You’ve always hated the cold, but you can’t wait till fall when you can wear more leather jackets and combat boots.
- Why for the love of God is there no music vid involving their brown belt karate skills?
- You religiously listen to all their songs, even the old ones, and occasionally you find rather embarrassing tracks like “Superstar” stuck in your head. (I mean, it’s kind of catchy…)
- You annoy your little brother by subjecting him to your T&S playlist in the car. When you wear an outfit with a denim shirt and khakis and ask him what it reminds him of, he answers with an eye-roll, “Body Work.” He knows this because you’ve made him watch the video at least 5 times, and he now regrets saying he liked the song.
- You find ways to quote song lyrics whenever possible, including when texting or to describe how you feel in a Facebook post. Nobody gets it!
- You’re devastated that the timing of your obsession just missed their last tour, and they won’t be back to Chicago for awhile.
- You’re not a sports person; in fact the last time you played a sport was in 9th grade gym class, but you allow your brother to make you play hockey in the driveway using snow shovels and a plastic softball because it reminds you of of Canada. What is the world coming to?!
- You’ve liked every fan page of theirs on Facebook so that your news feed is always filled with awesomeness. You’ve never looked forward to a gazillion posts about a little furry gray cat so much!
- Your dream girl is Sara Quin, but in real life you might settle for someone who reminds you of her.
Seriously, how can you not fall in love with that? I dare you to try.